Examine Your Motivation
“There are only two ways to influence human behavior: you can manipulate it or you can inspire it.”—Simon Sinek.
Motivation doesn’t last because it is weakened when challenges arise. We are emotional beings, and although we possess highly sophisticated forebrains, our limbic system drives our actions, influenced by unconscious desires that reside deep within our reptilian brain, which includes the brain stem and cerebellum. Its purpose centers on physical survival and the homeostasis of our body. Therefore, its primary function is preserving our survival and controlling movement, breathing, reproduction, and other basic survival needs. Moreover, it controls our unconscious actions and is resistant to change. Even when starting a new habit, our attempts can be hijacked by the reptilian brain. In contrast, the thinking brain accounts for 20% of our decision-making, which explains why behavioral change is often met with resistance.
Most people live on autopilot and are dictated by their instincts, which means the reptilian brain is in command. The problem occurs when we give in to gratification instead of engaging the logical mind to examine these urges. Motivation doesn’t last because our unconscious desires repeatedly hijack it despite our best intentions. I liken it to having someone touch our back to keep us moving forward. If they remove their hand, we are likely to lose our motivation. The American motivational speaker Jim Rohn said: “Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” He knew that motivation alone was not enough to sustain our efforts. Knowing this, I believe Good Habits + Compelling WHY = Success are two important components that help us achieve our goals and success. What are your thoughts about this? Do you think it is motivation or something deeper?
The HOW, the WHAT, and the WHY
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche.
I’ve coached hundreds of people over the past decade, ranging from athletes to CEOs, and the one key factor that often comes up in coaching sessions is feelings. People usually say they don’t feel motivated to act or commit to a habit because they respond to their emotional brain and give in to its demands. So, if motivation doesn’t last, what does? What is required is a powerful WHY? According to motivational author Simon Sinek, many people and organizations focus on the HOW and WHAT as their primary motivators. In his Golden Circle principle, the HOW and WHAT occupy the outer rings of the circle, while the WHY fills the center. The WHAT is the role of the neocortex, which is responsible for rational, analytical thought and language. The limbic brain governs the HOW and is accountable for our feelings, trust, and loyalty. It governs human behavior and decision-making and has no capacity for language.
The WHY is ruled by the limbic brain and handles intuition and decision-making. In other words, when we have a commanding WHY, we will likely associate powerful emotions with our actions, leading to a greater chance of success. To highlight an example, I’m currently working with a young lady who is a women’s netball player. Jane was injured over 12 months ago when she rolled her ankle during a game. Whilst her injury did not require surgery, she suffered a grade II tear to the ligaments in her ankle, which required twelve months of rehabilitation. In our first meeting, I asked Jane what she enjoyed about playing netball (WHY?). This wasn’t easy to answer, so I had to probe further. However, by the end of the session, she stated that her motivation to play netball stemmed from her childhood memories of going to netball games with her mother. She could recall the excitement of spending time with her mother and experienced a flood of emotions as she recounted the experience. I could see tears fill up in her eyes, and I knew we found a strong reason to help regain her life again. The good news is that Jane has fully recovered and intends to return to the game for simple reasons. She discovered her compelling WHY to do the work because she knew it was too important to leave to motivation.
Take The Emotional Journey Into Yourself
“Happiness comes from what we do. Fulfilment comes from why we do it.” ― Simon Sinek.
I’ve worked with many similar clients, and the common theme is helping them uncover their WHY. I’m not saying motivation doesn’t exist or there isn’t a place for it. Based on my experience, a powerful WHY trumps motivation every time because motivation is like a fuse that burns quickly. I also help my clients establish sound habits to support their goals and draw their awareness to the change cycle. Motivation alone doesn’t guarantee results, nor can you rely on it because it comes and goes. Everyone is motivated at the beginning of a new habit, goal, or project, yet the individual is unmotivated six months later. This is when life gets in the way or when unexpected challenges arise. Can you identify with this? Think about a recent goal or project and recall your motivation initially and throughout. Did it wane, or were you just as motivated throughout the journey?
In Jane’s case, four weeks out from her fitness test to qualify, she developed inflammation in her knee, which required scaling back her training program. Most people would give up; however, Jane realized the goal was too important to her. Her compelling WHY was more important than the short-term setback of an injured knee. Don’t get me wrong, I am not underscoring the value of rest and rehabilitation. I suggest a powerful WHY can help us overcome short-term challenges and remain committed to our goals. Thankfully, she managed the injury via a refined exercise program instead of abandoning it altogether. I appreciate the schools of thought that grit, resiliency, and a growth mindset are paramount to achieving our goals.
If we don’t have a convincing WHY, we will unlikely achieve success based on these principles alone. Therefore, consider the following questions before you undertake a goal or project to get clear on your primary motivation:
- Why is this goal/project important to me?
- What will it mean if I achieve this goal/project?
- Will I be fulfilled if I accomplish this goal/project?
When answering the first question, continue asking WHY until you reach an emotional reaction. You should push yourself beyond your comfort zone to discover the importance of undertaking your goal. The process requires an emotional journey into yourself because you are tapping into the limbic brain. You will only realize why you are pursuing a specific goal or action. After all, if we don’t understand the reason behind our motivation, what use is the goal when it is achieved?
Are You Ready to Transform Your Life with Confidence?
Are you ready to transform your life and unlock your potential? Start your journey with me today! My Life Coaching Program has empowered many to achieve lasting change. Schedule your FREE 30-minute consultation now and take the first step towards a brighter, more confident you.
Tony Fahkry
Expert Life Coach
