Stop Handing Over Your Authority
“When we have begun to take charge of our lives, to own ourselves, there is no longer any need to ask permission of someone.” — George O’Neil.
Do you ever look for guidance outside yourself, hoping someone else holds the answers you need? We live in a world filled with advice, experts, and information, yet the deepest wisdom is already within us, waiting to be revealed. When you stop surrendering your authority to others and trust in your own inner guidance, you reclaim the power to navigate life on your terms. What you seek isn’t in someone else’s teachings or advice. It’s within you, revealing itself through whispers of intuition, the synchronicities you encounter, and the lessons woven into your everyday experiences.
Although the answers you search for cannot be found outside of you, you can learn to tune in and listen to what is happening within. Those you ask for answers will advise you from their personal experience and, sometimes, their inner wisdom. No matter how free-thinking they are, they cannot know what life has in store for you. They cannot possibly know what lies ahead in your journey, so you must trust your own path. Does this idea resonate with you? Are you willing to consult your inner wisdom to find the answers to your questions? For instance, the Buddha cautioned following other people’s teachings centuries ago when he said: “Do not give up your authority and follow blindly the will of others. This way will lead to only delusion.”
The Key to Making Wise Decisions
“No one and nothing outside of you can give you salvation or free you from the misery. You have to light your lamp. You have to know the miniature universe that you are.” — Banani Ray.
As the Buddha poignantly demonstrates, abdicating our authority to others prevents us from receiving the answers we need. We should own our mistakes, however painful, for they hold clues to realizing the truth. The biggest adventure you will embark upon is discovering your truth and living it to the best of your ability. I compare it to tuning a radio station. You might dial one direction and miss the reception, then dial back the other way and land on the correct frequency. Put simply, what may seem like a wrong turn is often just life unfolding as it should. Therefore, be wary of handing over your authority to another person since they may disappoint you. This is apparent in relationships where one partner delegates their happiness or emotional well-being to the other, only to realize later they were deceived.
Just as we may give up our authority in general life decisions, we often do the same in relationships, expecting others to fulfill our happiness. Hence, we may suffer because they might not meet our expectations. I’m not suggesting you don’t consult with others to seek different opinions; this is a wise course of action. I’m suggesting that after you have done so, turn within and see if you can make sense of the advice to discover your own answers. Our expectations kill many relationships because we believe we are owed something. People will let you down when their truth does not agree with yours. To empower yourself, tap into the wisdom that resides within you. If you’re constantly besieged by noise or other people, you drown out the voice within. The answers you seek often appear through inner knowing, intuition, messages, or symbols. Similarly, let go of the worry that preoccupies your mind. We live in a world overshadowed by news events that seize our attention daily. Our brains are alerted to imminent fear because we sympathize with news stories instead of focusing on our inner wisdom.
That said, external guidance can be invaluable in certain situations. Seeking advice from mentors, experts, or trusted individuals can provide us with valuable insights, especially when facing unfamiliar challenges. Learning from others’ experiences can offer us new perspectives and help us make informed choices. The key is to use external guidance as a tool for navigating decisions in our lives, but not as a safety blanket. In other words, take in advice, reflect on it, and then consult your inner wisdom to determine whether it resonates with your journey. For instance, I’ve been fortunate to have wonderful mentors who have guided my professional journey over the years. Their wisdom has been invaluable, but I always contemplated their advice through my own intuition before taking action. This helped me to strengthen my confidence in my own decisions.
So, just as guidance is sometimes required from trusted sources, the overarching theme in this article is to trust your instinct since it holds the keys to life. No matter your decisions, believe in yourself. Every experience carries a lesson for your personal growth, and every life event—even those you deem undesirable—holds a key lesson for your growth. In The Art of Self-Therapy by author Nick Trenton, a passage stood out to me where he emphasizes that self-awareness grows through regular practice. He suggests making it a daily habit by asking yourself, “What am I noticing about myself now?” This simple question may seem inconsequential, but it is important to become more self-aware and make decisions that align with your deepest desires.
Your life is your own to create, and no one else can walk your path for you. The key to making informed choices and finding clarity isn’t in the advice others echo but in the quietness of your inner wisdom. When you stop looking outside of you for permission and learn to trust the signs, instincts, and deeper knowing within you, you reclaim the authority that was always yours. So, take a step back from the noise. Start observing, questioning, and listening to your insights today. Keep a journal, and notice what your intuition tries to tell you. Your truth is waiting for you to embrace it. The power was always yours, so now is the time to claim, trust, and live it.
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Tony Fahkry
Expert Life Coach
